Some time ago I got the offer to visit a “profession coach” for free, so I decided to take the offer and give it a shot.
Prior to that my opinion of coaches and coaching was that it was some new-age-feel-good and tell me about your problems kind of thing.
That it was something only for people who didn’t have introspection enough to actually know themselves and their desire. That was why I never had thought about going to such a one and least of all paying for it.
Back when I studied economics, I read a number of management books, “self-improvement” books, “know yourself” books, some business psychology and all that. All the information from such reading combined with a strong trait of being introspective and self-analyzing, I’ve always been pretty secure in my choices and ambitions. This doesn’t mean that I do not make wrong choices – heck no, but I make the choices I feel are best for me in a current situation based on rationale and analyzing my own desires. Anyways – these traits and this level of knowing myself, was what had formed my opinion about coaching.
So as the day of my appointment moved closer I started to think about what I wanted from the session. I only had the one session and I decided to look at it with an open mind (mostly because it was free).
My first thought would be that no doubt he would ask me “where I want to be in X years” and “how do you want to get there”. And then I was pretty sure he’d try to challenge my ideas about “myself”.
This formed my preparing for the session and on the day I went to the office and got introduced and the session started: “Where do you want to be in 5 years”……. *sigh* Well okay I thought and started to explain my situation and there I felt the chain "break" for him.
I explained to him that I did not really care where I would be in 5 years, but for me it was about how I moved forward. That, for me, “it” is all about the journey and not the destination. That work and career for me was about learning daily and improving myself and then see where that journey takes me and which opportunities open up.
He pulled out a piece of paper and drew a line on it ending with an X and tried to get me to specify what/where X was. That was when I knew that I couldn’t get him to understand “me” and what drives me and that set the tone of the rest of the session. I took the pen and tried to illustrate that my “path” could take me in all directions and I did not want – nor need – a straight direction to a defined goal
He then tried to bring me back on his track, by asking what only felt like scripted questions and I kept feeling somehow out of the box because the questions didn’t fit me. It felt like I had to be stuck into the box he set up, his framework of how people tick.
Sure I couldn’t expect more from a free session, and perhaps if I had multiple sessions, I’d be able to use it for something useful. But as I left I left with the same opinion that I arrived with.
And that is that coaching is for people who do not know where they stand in life and want a clear goal.
For those of us where our profession is the means and not the goal – I feel it is useless.
For those of us who know ourselves and are secure enough in that knowledge – I feel it is useless.
Might just be a bad experience though but it plays into my already formed stereotype. I know now that I would never pay for such a service based now on both opinion and experience.
Coaching to me, feels like a scam. People who’ve read a few books and preys on insecure people. If people need somebody to ask critical (scripted questions), then I’m sure we can develop an automatic coach. I would advice everybody to think twice before handing their money over for something such as this. Read a book instead, google the questions, but just think twice.